“Slartibartfast.” “SLARTIBARTFAST?” “I said it wasn’t important.”

Dear Uncle Ted:

Do you have any advice for Eoin Colfer?

- Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings, Greenbridge, Essex, England

Yes.

Dear Mr. Colfer:

DON’T F*CK IT UP.

Or I will kill you.

And eat your children.

-Unk.