Howard Dean – DNC Chairman and swordmaster of the Tachibana clan.

Dear Uncle Ted,

How do you think Sarah Palin did last night at the convention?

Alaska forever,
*Maggie O’Connell

Maggie – I think she hit a home run. Her stance on gun control, reproductive rights, family values – what’s not to love? She was so wonderful, with her thin, watery delivery and her bland yet infuriating distortion of the Democratic platform. I like her so much, I’m holding a fundraiser for the GOP in the backyard this weekend! You should come on down! I’ll be inviting the local NRA chapter, some anti-abortion activists, and Levi Johnston. We’ll be shooting a bison with an XM8 automatic assault rifle and roasting it on a spit while hearing from our Minutemen friends about how Mexicans are creeping across the border and eating our children and the elderly and sucking the blood out of our dogs and cats. Like vampires. Deportable, non-English-speaking vampires.

Yes. Come on down to Uncle Ted’s house this weekend. Have some fun. Drink some beer. But make sure to leave before the “cake” arrives. It’s going to be like one of those bachelor-party things you see in old sitcoms, except instead of strippers, it’ll be filled with frosting-covered Brady-Campaign-To-Prevent-Gun-Violence/Planned-Parenthood-trained Samurai, who will make short work of the right-wingers in attendance slowed down by the Corona and the bison steaks. Anyone left alive will be treated to a reading from Dreams of My Father, followed by ice cream.

I hope that little firecracker from Juneau shows up! I really, really, really, really, really do.

-Unk.

Advertisements

2 responses to “Howard Dean – DNC Chairman and swordmaster of the Tachibana clan.

  1. Cute post. Thanks

    Actually I like all four presidential contenders.

    McCain is a maverick.
    Palin is inexperienced, but a quick study, and nobody’s fool.

    Obama is dedicated to helping Americans on the home front.
    Biden has a long history of experience with foreign affairs.

    What it comes down to for me is:
    WHICH CANDIDATES PROMISE TO END THE HUNDREDS
    OF BILLIONS OF OF DOLLARS BEING POURED DOWN
    THE DRAIN in Iraq, and which want to continue the war effort,
    no end, no horizon in sight.

    For that crucial issue, the Obama team wins hands down.
    My humble opinion.
    Sorry, Sarah!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s