“So we’ll kiss now and get it over with, and then we’ll go eat. We’ll digest our food better.”

Dear Uncle Ted,

My name is Angela and I’m in the 4th grade. I think this boy in class likes me but I can’t tell for sure. I was wondering if you can tell me how I can tell if a boy likes me.

Angela Pierce, Rochester, MN

Oh, Angela. Boys your age are just beginning to get interested in girls, and they’re just as nervous about this sort of stuff as you are. You may hear from your friends that the boy or the boy’s friends have been asking about you at school. But don’t listen to them. You wait. You wait and you wait. He may send you emails. He may try to talk to you in a chat room. He may send you notes in class, or slip them into your locker. He may have flowers or large parcels of your favorite candy sent to your house. He may even talk his parents into spending his college fund on getting the Jonas Brothers to sing you a love song on your front lawn.

But until you get three consecutive, unequivocally positive responses from your cootie-catcher, I’d say the private concert and the Nintendo Wii purchased with three years’ worth of lawn-mowing money are just empty gestures.

And don’t just keep picking even numbers. For true love, you’ve gotta be willing to take risks.

– Unk.

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